It’s amazing how the truth gets you like that.
This is not what we want to be whispering on our deathbed. You know, evil. Gold heart ring that says sunshine like Crazy, right? And this stillness of life did not in the least resemble a peace.
Even when he is spooked, Leonard still looks like a million dollars. The handsome face and the gleaming smile remain, even if they are worn by the years of pain.
The year-old struggled for decades with the secret fact that he had been sexually molested twice as a boy by middle-aged men; while his more recent trials with drugs and alcoholism crossed bleak terrain.
Yet this is how an involving interview with one of the greatest fighters in history unfolds, as Leonard reacts with raw immediacy. And so I recount in more detail how, years ago in Las Vegas, Hugh McIlvanney, the great boxing writer, who then worked for the Observer, listened patiently while I waffled on about Mike Tyson’s “bad intentions”.

McIlvanney smiled sagely and asked what I thought of the retired Ray Leonard. I’d only seen Leonard fight on television and I wittered some more about Sugar’s sublime artistry.
McIlvanney cut to the core. He spoke vividly of the hard chip of ice that Leonard stored in his fighting heart. Sugar Ray must have endured terrible darkness to fight with such chilling brilliance.
Every time I stepped into the ring I had that chip of ice. My brother, Roger, saw it when we were sparring.
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I moved towards him and he said, ‘Stop, Ray! Look at your fucking eyes. You look like you wanna kill me! Did I fight so hard because I was distressed by the sexual abuse?
This suggests that the Company is inwardly corrupt—and it’s probably true. I’d only seen Leonard fight on television and I wittered some more about Sugar’s sublime artistry. Gold heart ring that says sunshine like The sheer unexpectedness of it made my hair stir under my cap.
Not to my knowledge. Outside, I’m not a confrontational guy. Even if I’m used to talking on TV I’m actually reserved and quiet — almost shy.
But I could be a mean guy in that ring because I felt confident. Leonard looks up as sunshine streams in through his London hotel window.

That was the one place I felt safe. I could control what happened in the ring. My heart turned icy. An Olympic gold medal winner, to whom the trainer Angelo Dundee hitched his stool as the only possible successor to Muhammad Ali, Leonard kept his real life secret.
The raw truth is out now. Even after his victory in the Olympic Games, Leonard nearly abandoned boxing. He tells an upsetting anecdote of how close he came to giving into heroin just months after he won gold in Montreal.
A despairing Leonard ended up in an apartment where a bereft group of black men injected each other with heroin.
He begged them: “Hit me, man, hit me. Leonard shows me his arm and remembers how one of the junkies wrapped a cord around him to make his vein rise up.
The old fighter narrows the gap between his thumb and index finger to a few millimetres. But one guy stepped in. He said: ‘Hey, Ray, don’t fuck your life up.
You’re the champ, man. He succumbed years later to cocaine and drink but, before then, as Leonard says wearily, “I went on this tumultuous rollercoaster ride.
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I came from nothing and achieved humungous fame and fortune. But I worked hard. I had discipline and determination.

I had that ice in me. Ali was one of the first to recognise Leonard’s extraordinary resolve.
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Norton had won the first, Ali the second. A tough night lay ahead for Ali. It was mind-boggling that Ali could think about me turning pro just minutes before the bell.
He said: ‘Make sure no one owns you. Be your own man.
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Leonard sidestepped the controlling web of Don King and Bob Arum and forged a deliberately independent path. He relied on a white lawyer, Mike Trainer, to guide him through the promotional minefield and followed Ali’s instruction as he made and kept most of his millions.
Yet Leonard’s legacy burns most fiercely in the ring.

We go over the old fights again, Leonard sweeping aside my reticence to travel down the beaten track once more. Leonard pulls off the trick of making me believe his stories are still as riveting to him as they are to me.
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Days later, some still linger in my head. Some people out there, in the streets, can shoot you in the face and then go get some lunch. They have no conscience.
He got to me the first time. But, five months later, Leonard came to the rematch with a different plan. This was drugged-up Roger.
In the gym he said: “You have to piss him off. You gotta make him mad with you. I threw those crazy bolo punches and the audience was laughing.
Really laughing. He was a bad bully and here I was ridiculing him. Eventually, he just quit. He threw up his hands in frustration and walked away.
He never realised the ramifications it would have on the rest of his life. But that fight should not dictate his legacy. I was in my car.
He was being driven in the back of his car. What are the chances of that happening — after one of the biggest fights in history? He lifted his hand to me — but there was no life in him.
I don’t think a day goes by when he’s not reminded of it.

I know I’m asked about it every day because it’s one of those moments in sporting history that fascinates people. He hears that question every day and I feel for him.
I respect and like him now. But I know he won’t address it. He won’t go there.
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It’s just like I wanted to avoid the sexual abuse so long. He also shocked the world by coming out of retirement in to icily steal a decision from the ferocious Hagler — who has yet to forgive him.
But, more than those momentous contests, Leonard’s battles outside the ring now define him. Like so many fighters, he felt lost when his boxing prowess slipped away.
He still had money to burn, and a huge posse of fawning acolytes and groupies around him, and Leonard began to use cocaine as a way of pursuing the intensity he had felt as a boxer.
Those guys would always say, late at night, ‘C’mon, Sugar Ray, have one more…’ The drugs came first but the alcohol became the major problem.
When I started the book we had one child in the fourth grade and another in the sixth grade.
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My wife worried because she was thinking from a wife’s and a mother’s standpoint and trying to protect us. But if I had kept suppressing it, it would’ve finally killed me.
I don’t mind that, talking about it, I sometimes cry. I feel such lightness now it’s out. When Leonard attended his first AA meeting six years ago he was instantly recognised.

But, even here, I open up the mini-bar and I think about it a little. One part of my head says, ‘Come on, you can do that. I stay strong.
He tells me the same stories every time I go to the house. Five minutes later, he starts telling them all over again. But he’s old.
I could control what happened in the ring. right hand ring designs with round diamond stone Even after his victory in the Olympic Games, Leonard nearly abandoned boxing.
He’s been married 62 years to my mother. I cushioned myself.

But that’s no way to live. Now, I’m straight every time I go home.
